What to do if your Baby won’t stop crying (and you’ve tried everything)

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Tried every trick in the books and the crying won’t stop? Here is What to do if your Baby won’t stop crying (and you’ve tried everything).

Dealing with kids requires a lot of effort and patience.

That reminds me of what happened with my youngest. It’s 1 .00 AM in the early hours of the morning and I haven’t slept a wink, my baby won’t sleep and she won’t stop crying either.

At first, I thought she was hungry, so I fed her. Then I checked her diaper, thinking maybe it was soaked, and changed it. I swaddled her snugly, then even tried backing her the Nigerian way but nothing worked. I sang every lullaby I could think of, but she just kept crying and crying.

The sound of these non-stop cries to the ear of a parent can open a can of intense emotions, especially when you’ve tried every trick in the book and nothing is working. It can make you feel so helpless.

You begin to wonder if this relentless crying will ever end, and if you’re truly cut out for this. So here you are, you are utterly drained, and questioning everything you thought you knew about parenting.

Does this sound familiar? Take a deep breath because you are not alone. This is one of the hardest part of parenting.

It is important to understand that feeling overwhelmed by a crying baby isn’t unique to you alone. This is a shared reality for all parents. We have experienced it at one point or another.

Yes, all your usual and even unusual tricks will fail. Your patience will completely run out, and you’ll find yourself staring at your still-crying baby with a mix of fierce love and absolutely nothing left to lose.

This post isn’t here to judge your efforts or suggest you’ve done anything wrong. Instead, it’s designed to be that guiding hand, reassure you, and give you that practical road map for what to do next when your usual strategies fall short.

What to Do If Your Baby Won’t Stop Crying (And You’ve Tried Everything)

1. First Things First: Do the basic checks

I am not trying to make you feel there is something you missed but to acknowledge the effort you already put in. Check for the following:

Hunger: Is your baby well fed? Sometimes, a quick “snack feed” isn’t enough, and they’re still hungry just a short while later. A satisfied baby often means a quiet baby.
Diaper: Is their diaper wet, or messy? A fresh, dry bottom can make all the difference.
Comfort Check: Are they too hot or too cold? In Nigeria, especially now, being too cold can be a big issue and sometimes, we put a bit too much clothing on them. Is anything in their clothes or sleepwear making them uncomfortable? Maybe a tag scratching, or something bunched up?
Burp/Gas: Wind pains can be intense for tiny tummies. Have you tried burping them thoroughly after a feed? Sometimes, trapped gas can cause significant discomfort and fussiness.
Tiredness/Over-tiredness: This is a tricky one. Are they ready for sleep, or have they missed their sleep window and are now overtired? An overtired baby can be incredibly difficult to settle, even though all they need is sleep.
Position Change: Sometimes, all it takes is a change of scenery or position. Have you tried swaddling them (if they’re still in the swaddling stage)? Holding them upright against your shoulder, trying tummy time (briefly and supervised, of course), or walking around with them in a baby carrier might provide the relief they need.
Environment Check: Is the room too bright, too noisy, or too quiet? Sometimes, babies get overstimulated by too much going on. Other times, they might find a little background noise comforting.

If you have checked all these basics on the list above, now, let’s look at what else might be going on when those usual tricks aren’t working.

2. Discomfort or Pain (Medical Concerns)

Also check for the following:

Temperature: Check if they have a Fever? It is always advisable to have a thermometer at home and learn how to read it.
Physical Checks: Check their fingers and toes for hair tourniquets, rashes, strange marks.
Illness Signs: Stuffy nose, cough, unusual fussiness with feeding, changes in stool.
Reflux/GERD: Arching back during/after feeds, frequent spitting up, discomfort when lying flat.
Allergies/Sensitivities: (Especially to cow’s milk protein in formula or from mother’s diet). Discuss symptoms like excessive gas, rash, mucus/blood in stool.
Ear Infection: Pulling at ears, fever.
Over-stimulation: Too much noise, light, too many faces, too much activity. Move to a quiet, dimly lit room, minimal interaction, gentle shushing, swaddling.
Under-stimulation: Boredom (less common in newborns, but possible in older infants). Gentle interaction, change of scenery (e.g., car ride, baby carrier walk outside).
Consult a Doctor: Emphasize that if you suspect illness or pain, always contact your paediatrician or a trusted doctor immediately. Don’t hesitate.

3. The “Witching Hour

This isn’t a myth, it is very real, a developmental phase for babies. It usually happens in late afternoon or evenings around 5 .00 PM to 10.00 PM.

Your baby transforms into a fussy, screaming baby without any apparent reason. The frustrating thing about this is that there often isn’t one single, obvious cause for this.

You’ve checked the diaper, offered a feed, tried to burp them, confirmed they’re not too hot or cold, and yet the crying persists. It’s often relentless, intense, and can feel like it goes on forever.

So, what is really happening? Scientifically, there is no reason. The widely accepted explanation is that the baby little systems are simply overloaded from all they have experienced throughout the day.

They are overwhelmed and unable to self-regulate. This can be a very tough time for parents and they end up feeling exhausted, and frustrated.

The best approach isn’t to fight it, but to prepare for it and have some strategies ready in your toolbox

If your baby typically gets fussy around 5 .00 PM, start shifting your activities before that time. Don’t plan exciting outings or doctor’s appointments for late afternoon.

Eat early as a hungry baby combined with over-stimulation is a recipe for a major meltdown. Start dimming the lights telling your baby that the day is winding down.

Lower noise by putting off the TV. Give your baby a warm bath to help soothe and signal the transition to night.

Even if the crying starts, try to stick to a consistent sequence of evening events (e.g., feed, bath, quiet time, PJs, lullaby, bed). This predictability is comforting.

Don’t underestimate the power in direct touch. Undress your baby down to their diaper (and you, too, be comfortable). then hold them close against your bare chest.

The warmth, your heartbeat, and your familiar smell are incredibly regulating for a baby’s nervous system. It’s a natural calming mechanism that can often work wonders.

4. Some babies are simply more sensitive or prone to fussiness

These little ones are often referred to as “high needs” babies. They are more sensitive and are easily stimulated.

They often prefer to be held, carried, or in constant physical contact with a caregiver. They might protest loudly when put down.

When they’re happy, they’re very happy. But when they’re upset, they’re very upset, and their cries can be very difficult to ignore.

It’s their unique temperament and personality shining through, even at this very early stage.

While it means more work and patience from your end, it also removes the heavy burden of guilt that often accompanies the persistent crying.

Practical Ways Parents Can Recharge and Cope

When your baby won’t stop crying and you’re feeling utterly overwhelmed, drained, and even angry, it is 100% okay, and even necessary, to step away for a few moments.

Your baby needs a calm, regulated parent, and sometimes, you need a moment to get there.

If you’ve checked all the basics and the crying continues to escalate, gently put your baby down in a safe place. This means their crib, bassinet, or playpen, somewhere they are secure and cannot fall or hurt themselves.

Then, take a quick glance to confirm they’re okay, then step out of the room for a few minutes. . Take deep, slow breaths. Cool down before you return.

Call for Backup, could be your partner, mum, sister or a kind neighbour. Pick up the phone and ask for help.

Even a few moments of someone else holding the baby while you step out for fresh air or a quick cup of water can make a world of difference.

This phase is temporary. Babies cry, and then they stop. Remind yourself that this intense period of fussiness is a season, not a lifetime.

The “Cry It Out” Myth vs. Responsive Cuddling

You’ve probably heard the phrase “just let them cry it out.” “Crying it out” is generally NOT recommended for newborns, maybe for older babies, it can be considered.

But for your newborn, crying is their first language. It is their only way of communicating.

Think about it: they can’t tell you, “Mummy, my tummy hurts,” or “Daddy, I’m feeling overwhelmed.” Instead, they use the loudest tool they have is their cries.

This is to signal every single need or discomfort. They are not crying to manipulate you, to annoy you, or to test your patience. They are crying because something is wrong, or because they need you.

So, when your newborn is crying and you’ve checked all the usual suspects, know that simply holding them close and offering comfort isn’t “spoiling” them.

It’s providing them with the fundamental building blocks of security, trust, and emotional intelligence. You are teaching them that they are loved, seen, and heard.

Seek Professional Help if necessary

Trust Your instincts, If something feels “off” or different from typical crying. Seek medical help.

There are Medical Professionals such as:

Paediatrician/Doctor: For any suspected pain, illness, unusual symptoms (e.g., persistent vomiting, fever, lethargy, rash).
Lactation Consultant: If you suspect feeding issues, low supply, or latch problems contributing to hunger.
Chiropractor/Osteopath (with paediatric experience): For structural issues if recommended by a doctor (e.g., after a difficult birth).

For Mental Health Support

This is for the Parents. Acknowledge that persistent crying can take a huge toll on parental mental health (postpartum depression/anxiety).

I encourage reaching out to a therapist, counselor, or support group if feeling overwhelmed, sad, or hopeless.

This whole phase, with the constant crying and the overwhelming exhaustion, is very tough.

Despite the screams and the tears, your love and your presence are the most important things for your baby.

And here’s a vital truth to hold onto: babies do grow out of this intense crying phase. One day, you’ll look back at this tough time. It might still feel a bit raw, but you’ll also see just how incredibly strong you were and how far you’ve both come.